Nesting Habits of the Common Geezer

A few weeks back, a friend mentioned the nest she has built in her favorite sitting place. She asked if there were others of us who have this habit. Of course I loved the idea and it set me to thinking how each of us make our nests. There's quite a science to this fascinating Geezer behavior.

I think most of us start with the basics: a phone, television remote, and lamp are needed. Most of us have a wooby, which is what we call our chair blankets, but you probably have a name for yours, too. Our nest headquarters are in the living room, because that is where the recliners are. Also that is where the only television in our home is. TV and nesting go together for a lot of us.

Snacks. There have to be snacks, because without them we wouldn't need vacuum cleaners. If you are lucky, you have a dog that scarfs up anything you drop on the floor. I have found that cats won't do this, and in fact they like adding fur to your nest by rubbing their fur off and on to the backs of recliners and other comfortable furniture. Bring the vacuum cleaner back. You could be a very tidy Geezer who doesn't allow snacking in the living room or cats or dogs. I've known a few of these folks, but we don't seem to be able to bond.

I keep a jar of chocolate bits by my chair. Mr. S has a snack drawer by his chair. He used to have a basket full of mini candy bars, but that bit of nesting material had to go when his diet started. His nest has a rug in front of the chair, because he likes to eat in his nest and the rug is washable. This rug collects mustard (we don't have the space to explain that one), wine, coffee with cream, and any other bits Grover doesn't like. Nuts are kept in a jar near the sofa, because it forces us to get exercise to get them and/or go to the real snack nest in the kitchen. That's where we eat Cheetos.

Books are an essential part of the Geezer nest for most of us. They go along with crossword puzzles, the newspaper, and whatever magazines we've collected in the past few weeks. Since my nest seems to collect around me, I also have mail and things I don't understand the first time 'round. These include mystical information from medical tests, instructions on how to run new devices, financial messages, and mail that requires me to do something I don't want to do on the day it arrives. I have a coal hod for those things. When it overflows, I am forced to move paperwork to the auxiliary nest on my desk. Ah yes... time to admit we have more than one nest.

Getting old means you need more nests, because you need more stuff. A good example is the one next to the bed. Mr. S has a basic lamp, back scratcher, flashlight, and a collection of things he values. His nest is quite neat. Mine is a mess. I have my brand new shiny CPAP machine and its parts, tissues, books, my matching basic lamp, and bed nest #2. #2 is a basket that holds the wrist and hand braces I wear at night, one extra pillow, a flannel nightgown, and some mystery stuff I need to deal with. I also have a step, because I can't get on the bed without it. Getting old. Whee.

I'd bet my collection of succulents that ALL of you have a nest on your desk. If you don't, it only means you've hidden the mess in drawers or you just cleaned up your mess. Desks collect nesting material. Since mine is next to the back door, it also collects recyclables and anything headed to the garage or great outdoors. This can be annoying and downright messy. The other side of the desk is just as bad, but I have nothing to blame it on but myself. It helps that if Mr. S asks where to put important stuff, I always have the same answer. "Just put it on the desk." Sometimes even I am surprised at what I find there.

I think we all have a kitchen drawer that contains nesting material. Each time I look in mine, I remember a song from Sesame Street the kids and I used to sing. It was called, "One of These Things Just Doesn't Belong Here."

It's easier to close this nest than clean it. Kitchen nest #2 is a decorative colander meant to house bananas. There's all kinds of other weird stuff in there now, and I don't know how this happened. The bananas are perched on top.

In other words, nests are a phenomena of aging and of accumulating necessary stuff. We find it hard to discard nesting material, so most of us just keep moving it around. My non-scientific opinion is we just can't help ourselves. We're Geezers, and nesting is our specialty. We make 'em at home, in motels, hospitals, at other people’s houses, and in our cars and we're darned good at it. Why quit?